Life is often a dichotomy, and for one individual, it manifests in a blend of physical intensity and quiet indulgences. Years spent practicing tae kwon do, an enthusiasm for football and rodeos, coexist with a love for frozen yogurt, Netflix marathons, a good glass of cabernet, and the comfort of wood wick candles beside two beloved cats, Thelma and Louise. This unique mix, they believe, is a result of both genetic disposition and the influence of California’s free-spirited environment.

The roots of personal traits, including anxiety, can be traced to biological factors, environmental influences, or even the inadvertent conditioning passed down by anxious parents. Male anxiety—often referred to as “manxiety”—is particularly insidious, seeping into everyday life and decision-making. Having grown up with a father plagued by indecisiveness, this individual often found themselves second-guessing life choices, sometimes to the point of complete inaction, even when faced with something as trivial as a restaurant menu or a yellow traffic light.

Traditionally, men are expected to exude confidence and resilience, effortlessly handling responsibilities while indulging in stereotypically masculine pursuits—drinking beer, grilling meat, and engaging in competition. Yet, when it comes to their own well-being, they often neglect basic self-care. Routine check-ups are ignored, and discussions about mental health remain taboo. For a man experiencing anxiety, these social norms only amplify the irrationality of their fears.

This individual spent years as a self-diagnosed hypochondriac, convinced that every minor symptom signified a terminal illness. Countless hospital visits and a staggering amount of money in copays followed. What was mistaken for testicular cancer turned out to be an inguinal hernia from deadlifts. What seemed like genital herpes was merely an ingrown hair. Lyme disease? Just an allergic reaction to grass. And that suspected heart attack? Pure anxiety.

However, there were two instances where their concerns were warranted. At 18, they experienced intense chest pain and labored breathing—later revealed to be a collapsed lung. Dismissing it as heartburn, they avoided medical attention. Years later, intermittent blood in their urine was met with denial, despite its glaring severity. Fear of medical procedures overrode logic until surgery and chemotherapy became inevitable. This pattern of avoidance underscores the challenge of distinguishing between a legitimate health crisis and an anxiety-driven false alarm.

For men, anxiety often remains unrecognized, hidden beneath layers of distraction and denial. Many resort to alcohol, drugs, or extreme physical exertion to numb the unease. This individual, despite being naturally empathetic, found that anxiety manifested as irritability and anger, particularly in social settings or confrontations with strangers. The challenge of recognizing these triggers before reacting became a lifelong battle.

Psychologists agree that male anxiety frequently presents through physical symptoms—ulcers, hypertension, chronic pain—rather than overt emotional distress. Social conditioning discourages men from acknowledging vulnerability, leading them to bottle up their emotions. Ironically, this suppression only intensifies their struggles, contributing to substance abuse, relationship issues, and self-destructive behavior.

In this case, distraction became a primary coping mechanism. Excessive workouts, long runs, and competitive swimming provided temporary relief but were accompanied by excessive drinking and, later, cannabis use. Experimenting with THC resulted in moments of extreme panic—an unpleasant lesson in the dangers of self-medication.

Addressing chronic male anxiety requires more than avoidance. Experts suggest that men who acknowledge their struggles and seek support are better equipped to manage their mental health. Talking to others, whether in therapy or informal conversations, helps break the stigma. Many men, upon sharing their experiences, discover that they are far from alone in their struggles.

Effective strategies for managing anxiety include:

• Consulting a primary care provider for medical guidance, potential medication, or specialist referrals.
• Engaging in gender-specific therapy groups to foster a sense of solidarity.
• Using mental health apps like Calm, myStrength, or Headspace for accessible, private support.
• Exploring treatments such as biofeedback, SSRIs, SNRIs, or newer options like transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS).
• Prioritizing exercise, which helps regulate stress hormones and boosts mood-enhancing neurotransmitters.
• Adopting a balanced lifestyle with healthy nutrition and minimal substance use.

By combining these approaches, men can combat anxiety in a proactive and sustainable way. The journey toward mental well-being is not about eliminating anxiety altogether but learning to navigate it effectively. In doing so, they reclaim control over their lives—without resorting to denial, distraction, or self-destruction.